I’ve decided to start a challenge I stumbled upon on one of my many pointless searches on the internet. I have been feeling unfulfilled in a way, so I wanted to look up something that would help me to feel better about, not only myself, but about life in general. At first, I came across a “30 Day Happiness Challenge.” This challenge consists of a random thing to do each day that is positive and can help to make me feel happiness from doing so. I begin that today, starting with making myself go to bed earlier than usual, and hopefully waking up feeling more energized. Another list I came across was a random acts of kindness type challenge. I set myself around 20 or more things I want to do within a year’s time to help others. The last list, which has brought me here, is a “30 Day Writing Challenge.” I know I could post on here more often, but sometimes I draw a blank as to what I would even want to say, as well as feeling as though I couldn’t share what it was I was actually feeling. So, today I begin this writing challenge and I will be posting those writings here on my blog. I can not guarantee that they will be the most insightful or even interesting things to read, but I feel as though if I start writing more in general, my creativity and imagination will be ignited and I will be able to write feely whenever I feel like doing so. Well, I hope you enjoy!
Day One: 20 Random Facts About Myself
1) I am currently 23 years old.
2) I switched my major in college 4 times before deciding what it is I actually wanted to do. They were: psychology, nursing, teaching, and finally journalism. I still want to pursue a career in public relations.
3) The longest I’ve been single in the last 6 years has been 10 months. My first boyfriend I dated for 2 years, the second was 1 year, the third was 3 years, and my current boyfriend has been almost a year.
4) I suffer from a general anxiety disorder as well as borderline personality disorder (A.K.A emotionally unstable disorder). Most who have read my previous posts already know both of these things and as much as I hate being judged for them, I enjoy sharing them due to the fact that I have helped many other people either recognize they needed help, or gave them the support of someone else knowing what they’re going through.
5) I laugh at my own jokes more than other people laugh at them because I find myself to be hilarious.
6) I absolutely hate any type of flying insect. If something is crawling, I am fearless. If something is flying, I am a complete coward.
7) I’m musically inclined in the sense that I can usually pick up any instrument and within a few minutes, am able to play a couple of songs pretty well. I can play flute and piano the best.
8) I tend to come across pretty confident, but I am actually far from. There are many things I am uncomfortable about with myself, as I’m sure many other people are.
9) I absolutely love debating with people in a mature manner. I love compiling random facts and being able to openly discuss my opinions with another person who may not agree with my points of view. I love being able to listen to what other people’s opinions are and learning things I may not have known beforehand.
10) I absolutely, irrevocably, can not tolerate bullying in any way, shape, or form. The thought of it heats me to my core and makes me so repulsed. I deeply sympathize with those who suffer from unkind words and actions from others and I feel compelled to take a stand for them whenever I witness it going on.
11) I honestly find a good time to be chilling out with a few people, either bullshitting, laughing, and talking, or vegging out, watching TV. I do enjoy going out and be social, but nothing beats the feeling of being with people you feel most comfortable with.
12) I actually care what people think about me. Not so much in the sense that I would change who I am to please someone. Not even in the sense that I would dull who I am to be friends with someone. More so in the sense that I care if people think I’m nice or rude. I care if people think I’m trustworthy or a liar. I care if people think I’m presentable or a dirt bag. What I don’t care about is if their opinions of me are completely ungrounded and their dislike comes from a place either sparked by jealousy, or just general lack of knowledge.
13) It takes a lot for me to give up on people. I tend to give someone at least 10 chances before they finally prove to me that things will change until I actually cut ties with them. I find life to be too precious and short to hold grudges or anger toward another person.
14) I hold no resentment over any of my past failed relationships. Despite whether they cheated on me, abused me, or hurt me in any way, I find it to be a waste of energy to cling on to any bitterness that those situations can cause. I wish them all the best in life, and I actually feel happiness when they find happiness.
15) I like to learn the words to rap lyrics and make myself be able to rap along with complete ease. I don’t care if you think a lot of it is just noise and doesn’t make sense, hip hop is my one true love when it comes to music.
16) I have a huge family and I hope to have a big family of my own some day. I can’t imagine having only one or two children and not being close with any of my sisters. I think family is a huge part in molding who a person becomes and how they act in society.
17) I’m the type of person where if you text me randomly, I probably won’t answer; but if you text me saying you need help, advice, or just someone to talk to, I will be on every single thing you say like white on rice. I can’t stand having my loved ones feel alone.
18) I am one of the biggest animal lovers. I cried when I saw the elephants at the zoo simply because I was overwhelmed with how majestic they were. I feel compelled to take in each and every stray and help the find a home, and I’m sure that once I have my own place that home will be with me.
19) I feel emotions extremely deeply. I feel happiness in overwhelming amounts throughout my entire body and will smile endlessly when things are going well. However, I feel sadness just as deeply and at times it leaves me feeling empty and alone, even though I am far from.
20) And last, but not least, I swear entirely too much, but somehow I am able to keep myself completely composed when I am around people such as parents, bosses, or anyone in general who holds greater authority than me.
I like that this was first on the list of things to write about because I hope that this gave you, whoever may be reading, a little insight on who I am (outside of depression and all the things I write about in this blog). I will be posting each day for the next month and maybe, depending on what is going on in my life, I will post more than once each day.