How do you tell the ones you love that most days you just want to give up? Or that some days you look at yourself in the mirror and don’t even know who you are anymore? How do you explain that sometimes the pain ripping in your chest just makes you want to scream at the top of your lungs, but your mind is forcing you to hold it all in? How do you look them in the eyes and tell them that even though they’re looking back into yours, there’s nothing in there anymore?
Most days I wake up each day and feel genuine happiness. Most days I feel as though I finally have myself and my emotions under control. But as soon as I get a firm grips on the reigns, I suddenly lose control and struggle to hold on as I’m sent on another roller coaster that I’m sure I’m bound to fall off of sooner or later.
On days like today, I wake up feeling empty, yet full of deep sadness that I cant seem to identify. Days like today I go from sitting on the floor in tears, screaming at the world, to sitting in front of the mirror, unsure if who I’m looking at is actually the girl that other people claim to see. Days like today, I wonder if I’ll truly make it. Days like today, I struggle to pull through.